Top 5 Thursdays: Marvel Inventions

Top 5 Thursdays (T5T) is a top 5 list of things I consider list-worthy. Expect anything!

The Marvel universe is home to some of the brightest minds the world has ever known: Reed Richards, Hank Pym, and even the villainous Doom to name a few. When they’re not saving the world or destroying it, you would probably find them in their respective labs, garages or dirty sheds tinkering and toiling to create amazing inventions. But which ones take first prize at the science fair, if said science fair awarded extra points for balls out, extreme awesomeness? Let’s look at the top 5 greatest Marvel universe inventions I have ever come across to find out!


SPECIAL MENTIONS: Cerebro, Professor Xavier’s mutant detecting invention, would have been cooler if it didn’t fry anybody that used it that wasn’t a level 10 psychic. And the Super Soldier Serum loses points for having lost its formula, and for having the last remaining person with the stuff inside him assassinated, much to fan backlash.


5. ADAMANTIUM
Wolverine is the best there is at what he does because of Dr. Myron MacLain’s most famous, indestructible invention: adamantium. It’s so indestructible, a strip of it can withstand a point blank nuclear explosion, and if sharpened it can cut through most anything. Both heroes and villains have fought over this substance, which makes it the most sought after invention after the IPod. Of course, this gives Wolverine problems with the metal detector at airport security, but the positives far outweigh the negatives. Unfortunately, its awesomeness has been watered down by becoming as common as kryptonite at one point, and by having an origin as confusing as the first half of Final Crisis.


4. PYM PARTICLES
Henry Pym is not just known for pimp-slapping his wife once too often; he’s also known for creating Pym particles, the substance that can make things grow or shrink. He could have used said particles in fixing his marriage by, ehem, spicing things up in the bedroom, but instead he used it to become a hero whose identity depended on how he used it: Giant Man or Goliath when he Pym’d himself to go biggie size, Ant-Man when he had the sudden urge to ride on ants, and Yellowjacket if he wanted the best of both worlds. These days you can see Pym particles used with pleasing effect through Cassie Lang, the Young Avenger known as Stature. And by pleasing, I mean like this.


3. IRON MAN’S ARMOR
Tony Stark’s single greatest contribution to the human arms race, the Iron Man armor has gone through tons of changes, each more awesome than the last. It started as an unappealing silver suit with an old school radio antenna (probably to pick up his favorite 70’s radio tunes), now it’s sleek like a Porsche and has more weapons than a battleship. Today the armor is so advanced he’s got funny names for it like ‘collimated matrix armor’ or ‘ablative polymer honeycomb’ and other shit. In short, Tony Stark is his own shiny sports car or limo, but without the martini bar…much to his obvious regret.


2. ULTIMATE NULLIFIER
One of Galactus’ biggest ‘duh’ moments was when he let an a-hole like Reed Richards gain possession of his invention and one of the most powerful devices in the galaxy, the Ultimate Nullifier. What it basically does is erase something from existence, which pretty much screams ‘flawless victory’ no matter how you look at it. In Reed’s hands, it was the ultimate equalizer, sort of like a timely thrown steel chair in the middle of the ring when the ref’s knocked out cold, and with the same satisfying results. Of course, it comes with the unfortunate side effect of destroying the users themselves, but there’s something to be said of an invention that could make even a being like Galactus sweat.


1. SPIDER-MAN’S WEB SHOOTERS
Silver Age science at its finest! While 3M were dragging their knuckles in the sand and learning how to make fire, high school student Peter Parker was able to invent a liquid substance that would harden once in contact with air, and have the same tensile strength and elasticity as spider silk. He then stuck that into a device that could shoot web lines like a spider, and thus Spider-Man’s web shooters were born! But while Spider-Man found many uses for this flexible invention (including web shields, web gloves, even damn web hammocks!), it was its use as Spidey’s main mode of transport that would endear it to geeks like me everywhere. Especially when the first Spider-Man movie came out…man, who wouldn’t want to swing around in high speeds all over the city like that? With such unlimited possibilities, Spidey’s web shooters would stand as a comic book geek’s wet dream.


That's the top five most amazing Marvel universe inventions according to me. But don't think that's the last of it! The other half of the Big Two, DC Comics, has its share of kickass inventions themselves! So expect me to tackle that next week! If you agree, disagree or want to suggest your own list, use the comment link below and tell us about it!